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(Friday, January 05, 2007-)
+11:03 PM]*
# depression.-
i hate night time.
i feel very low.
i can't wait to cuddle with my memories, and sleep with dahlia's clothes. and the pictures of when mike and i loved each other, and when i was happy and when he loved me so much. i'll stay warm against the first note he gave me that he sent through the high school. you have no idea how happy that made me. i'll sit with dahlia's baby pictures, and wish that i could be next to her, and holding her and being her mom like i should have. because she'd love me and then i'd find out what love means.
i'll dream about waking up everyday to him kissing my face and giving me great big body hugs that made me so happy. i'll smile when i feel my butterfly kisses against my cheek. i'll pretend we just got home from prom. loving each other, and being close. falling asleep in the morning sun, and swimming together when we wake up. i'll be stuck in that tent under the stars thinking about how good we feel next to each other, and about how 24 hours a day isn't enough. i remember being content with sitting at home, just being near each other. i kissed every part of his body, and i would do it again every night.
i'm very depressed, obviously. change of location hasn't helped. i'm just stuck in my lonely rut by myself. i feel discarded and abandoned. my situation is grave.
so here i am.
the story ends like this..
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